Chosen

"But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.." 1Peter 2:9

I woke up early on December 3rd, 2020. I had promised my dear friends that I would be praying for the delivery of their firstborn son. At 6am in my prayer closet, I prayed for the new life they would bring into the world, not knowing that my own new chapter was coming later that morning. 

Just a few weeks earlier, I had sent in my application for the Vertical Worship Cohort 2021. 

It was truly a God ordained leading that caused me to do this, because in the natural it was not really the time for a new expenditure. We had just refinanced the house to pay off some large bills that had accumulated from my time not working. But you see, I am the girl who is always saying "Why doesn't God talk to me that clearly? Where is my 'burning bush?' 

It turns out He does talk to me, and He knows where to find me too. On my phone! Oy vey! With a job thats tied to social media, where else could He deliver a message that I wouldn't miss? That day I was riding in my car, without the music on. Very unlike me. As I drove back home, I asked the Lord, "Where is it that You want me to go? What am I supposed to do next?"

Ding! For real. My phone went off while stopped at the light. I looked down and it was the promo video for Cohort 2021. Instead of saying "Thank you, God" for speaking to me so clearly," I began to doubt. Was it really Him? Or is it just something that would be convenient and awesome for me, so I must have made it up my head?" Because I have a history of trying to run ahead of God, I have become more cautious and try to be more discerning. However, the enemy loves nothing more than to try to steal a blessing and cause me to second-guess the loving, kind, and gracious God that I am coming to know more fully. So I applied. 

They only choose 20'ish people a year. So part of me had already resigned myself to not being chosen in my attempt to soften the blow. Who likes rejection, right? But there was a still, small voice in me that was more at peace and assured me that if God went through that much trouble to get my attention (not just through the phone, but a series of other personal events) that this truly could be exactly where He wanted me to go. 

Chosen. I'm already chosen by God, so I know that desiring to be chosen by people is a detriment to my spirit and my identity in Christ. But isn't it nice? To be chosen? So, when my phone rang later that December morning, thinking it was a telemarketer, I didn't answer. When the text message popped up shortly thereafter from Lauren Smith, you can imagine I just about peed my pants! 

I was all prepared for the "Thanks, but no thanks" response, but instead she said, "...and we would love to have you join us for Cohort 2021." Friends, it was literal tears. To know (which was also my word for 2020) that God, through these people and this ministry of theirs, had chosen little 'ole me - a volunteer worship leader who doesn't read music, play an instrument, know anything about production, or really anything about anything - was going to sit under some of the most prolific worship leaders in the Church, humbled me to my core. 

So, here I am. All settled into my hotel room. God already blessing me with headache free days after a horrible time over the last month or so. Airplane seats to myself during this pandemic. A flight that landed in Chicago 20 minutes early so that I was able to catch a free ride with a Cohort alum instead of paying $50 for an Uber. Already meeting some of the nicest 2020 alums at the hotel who have warmly welcomed me and told me that this is family. The best sleep I have had in weeks last night!

I am ready. Ready for the transformative, surrendered, exchanged New Life. He has chosen me for this. For what future purposes, I have no idea. I'm just going to focus on today. What does He want me to know today?